Comic Versus Comic

One thing you probably don’t realize

unless you watch entirely too many reruns
and have a teenaged son
into vintage comics,

is that
Lucy Van Pelt and Lucy Ricardo
are the same girl.
Very same girl!
I swear!

Think about it for a moment.

She’s the world’s greatest fuss budget,
wears Peter Pan collars/saddle shoes,
has a way around a musician,
eleven letters in her name.
Who am I talkin’ ’bout, huh? Who?
Football Puller or Pouter Fluffball?

She has bottle-red hair,
a thing for bongo players,

and if I’m gonna be completely honest
so do I…

Matthew McConaughey – call me, ‘k?

We have penchant for getting into trouble
with a defiant mouth much too acerbic
for lanky pianists/drummers
with jazz-warped-tropical-sex-hey
minds.

Desi would spank us.

We would like it.

Schultz wouldn’t give me a voice,
come to think of it.

I would be the offscreen
teacher -

wha wah wha wah wah wha wah is what Freud heard -

my breasts squashed into conical
fifties wonder.

No wonder Peppermint Patty was so damned distracted in school.